| People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to Jerry Seinfeld Lies |
| More from Jerry Seinfeld |
| Actually, the only memory I have of being a Cub Scout was trying to get my hat back. That was all I did. Run back and forth at my bus stop going Jerry Seinfeld |
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| "A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking." Jerry Seinfeld |
| Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom. Jerry Seinfeld |
| There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked." Jerry Seinfeld |
| A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. Jerry Seinfeld |
| There is no such thing as fun for the whole family. Jerry Seinfeld |
| My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law. Jerry Seinfeld |
| Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason Jerry Seinfeld |
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| Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash. Jerry Seinfeld |
| Seems to me the basic conflict between men and women, sexually, is that men are like firemen. To men, sex is an emergency, and no matter what we're doing we can be ready in two minutes. Women, on the other hand, are like fire. They're very exciting, but the conditions have to be exactly right for it to occur." Jerry Seinfeld |
| More in the Lies category |
| Truth is not only violated by falsehood; it may be outraged by silence. Henri Fr?d?ric Amiel Lies |
| Truth exists, only falsehood has to be invented. Georges Braque Lies |
| It is better to be defeated on principle than to win on lies. Arthur Calwell Lies |
| Truth may be stretched, but cannot be broken, and always gets above falsehood, as does oil above water. Miguel de Cervantes Lies |
| There has already been published by the bucketfuls such brazen lies and utter fictions about me that I would long since have gone to my grave if I had let myself pay attention to that. Albert Einstein Lies |
| The most common lie is that which one lies to himself; lying to others is relatively an exception. Hietzsche Lies |
| Who lies for you will lie against you. Bosnian Proverb Lies |
| Truth is the safest lie. Jewish Proverb Lies |
| A half-truth is a whole lie. Jewish Proverb Lies |
| This above all: TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE. And it must follow as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man. William Shakespeare Lies |